The short answer
For some people, yes, and there is more than one kind. A group, a counselor and an online community work in different ways, so not liking groups rules out only one of them.
You can try one, and leave if it is not right. Leaving needs no explanation, to the group or to your friend.
This chapter describes what widows report and what health agencies say. It is not medical or mental-health advice. If you are worried about your health, talk to your doctor. If you have thoughts of not wanting to be here, call or text 988, or chat at chat.988lifeline.org. It is for anyone who is struggling. Veterans and their families can dial 988, then press 1, or text 838255.
What to do
- Call the hospice, if there was one, and ask whether you are on the bereavement plan of care and what it offers for the rest of the year.
- Ask your doctor for the names of a counselor and a group.
- Look up one more name on findtreatment.gov or in your plan's directory, with a helper if you like.
- Ask the office what you will pay before a first session with a counselor.
- Go to one meeting, with someone or on your own.
- Try a second if the first is wrong.
- Leave any group that leaves you feeling worse. You don't need to explain.
What can wait
- Committing to anything. One meeting commits you to nothing.
- Deciding whether you are a group person.
- Choosing between a group and a counselor. You can try either, both, or neither, in any order.
- Telling your friend what you decided. The hospice call is the exception, if the year since he died is not over yet.
Who can help
If hospice cared for him, its bereavement team is the first call. Your doctor can suggest names, and findtreatment.gov or your plan's directory can find someone near you. If one of the Vet Center conditions fits, a Vet Center offers free bereavement counseling.
SAMHSA's National Helpline, 1-800-662-HELP (1-800-662-4357), gives free referrals at any hour.
If you have thoughts of not wanting to be here, tell someone today. You can call or text 988, or chat at chat.988lifeline.org. It is for anyone who is struggling, and you do not have to be suicidal to reach out.
For most people who have these thoughts, support and treatment work. If the thoughts feel like a plan, call or text 988 now.
You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line. The Veterans Crisis Line is 988, then press 1, or text 838255, and it also serves families and friends. Where to get help tonight, at the back of this book, lists every line.
The rules, phone numbers and web addresses in this book were checked against the agencies’ own pages in October 2026. They change, so check anything you rely on with the office itself.
From Book 5: The First Year
This page has the short answer and the closing lists from chapter 11. The full chapter explains, in plain words, what exists, what to ask, and who can answer. The book covers months 6 to 15.
Hear when the next book is out
Five or six short emails a year at most, and a note when a new book is out. Each one is about something that tends to come up in the first two years. You can unsubscribe whenever you like.